Monday Moan 67

 

FRUSTRATING?  FOR YOU, PERHAPS, BUT NOT NECESSARILY FOR ME

Patrick McLoughlin, somehow Transport Secretary in the UK Government, used the Conservative Party Conference to announce plans for improved mobile broadband on trains.  According to McLoughlin, “there are few things more frustrating than trying to phone a friend or access the internet, only to be thwarted by bad signal.”

 

Oh really?  Few things in life more frustrating than that?  This is a pretty broad statement he’s making - taking everything into consideration, a dodgy mobile connection whilst on a train is right up there as one of the most frustrating things about the world today.  

 

It’s nonsense, of course.  On any kind of objective assessment of all the frustrating things in the world today, I’d guess that a poor mobile phone signal would rank somewhere below, for example, not being able to solve the unrest in Syria, Egypt, Somalia or countless other places.  It would be below not being able to find food or water in many parts of the world, or not being able to afford to buy those things in other parts of the world where they are available.  Being unable to care properly for the elderly or sick people you know would rank above the old mobile signal problem, as would being unable to find work so that you can support your family.  You get the point - it’s a pretty long list before you get down to having a bad connection on your mobile trying to speak to someone whilst whizzing through the countryside on a train, isn’t it? 

 

McLoughlin might have had more of a point if he had prefaced his ludicrous remark by saying “for me, …..”.   You couldn’t argue with that, although you might question whether he had a proper sense of priorities.

 

But perhaps we shouldn’t be too harsh on McLoughlin.  A quick check on the internet reveals that there are few things in life more frustrating than the following to a random selection of others:-  

• unfounded nuggets of biological determinism being presented as fact
• having to learn the layout of a new-to-me grocery store
• watching your smartphone’s battery life drain away by the middle of the day when you just put it in your pocket with a full charge that morning
• being delayed on a train or runway with no idea what is going on
• waiting for something to arrive
• having a powerful technological tool give you more headaches than be helpful
• dealing with a finicky cat
• dealing with a cumbersome process which will not do what you need done
• setting up an account, downloading the programme and then finding out that you can't actually run it on your machine
• an ugly carpet stain that just won’t go away
• having  broken air conditioning in the middle of August and not being able to get hold of your landlord 

 

 

Life is so hard, isn’t it?

 

GOOD GRACIOUS – IT’S A GOAT!

According to The Daily Telegraph last week Christians in Poland are angry because some goat’s cheese is being sold in one of their supermarkets for 6.66 zloty.  And the problem is?  Well, of course, everyone knows that ‘666’ is the sign of the devil.

Except that it isn’t, at least if you can follow and you believe the explanation of how ‘666’ came into being that has been provided by the entertaining and informative team at Numberphile.  Seems that the ‘devil’ in question was Emperor Nero, and that the number might just as easily have been ‘616’.  It’s a complicated explanation, but stick with it – it’s worth it.

Not content with objecting to the price as being the sign of the devil, in another report those same complainants also found the use of the picture of a goat to be offensive, because a goat is another satanic image.  

Outrageous isn’t it - goat’s cheese with a picture of a goat on it!

 

 

AND ON THE 7^TH DAY – THE DRILLING CONTINUED

Is it just in my road, or more specifically in the house next to mine, or is it now the done thing to have your builders work on a Sunday?  

After putting up with drilling, banging, hammering and other assorted noises all week whilst my neighbour (not in residence) was having work done on her house, I was looking forward to a day of quiet on Sunday.  This dream was shattered just after 8am when the dreaded blue van pulled up outside, the bag of tools was unloaded, and the noise started soon afterwards.

Can’t you show some consideration for one day of the week please?

 

 

LISTEN TO THE MUSIC. PLEASE!

I went to a fabulous concert last Friday in the brand new Milton Court Concert Hall in London – the first public concert in this new venue.

Great hall, brilliant performances by the orchestra and chorus of the Guildhall School (whose home it is) and a nearly full house.  

During the interval, a couple of elderly ladies decided to move from their seats at the side into the seats in front of me that had been empty during the first half.  Just as the second half was about to start a group of Italians arrived clutching tickets for those seats.  They enquired very politely of the ladies if they we in the correct places – “Oh yes, these are our seats” they replied, without so much as a blush or a hesitation.  10/10 for nerve, of course, but 0/10 for observation, since the Italians were holding the tickets that showed that the seats were rightfully theirs.  The Italians stood their ground and very politely, but firmly, pointed out that the ladies would have to move.

As the concert began again I was full of admiration for the way they had handled the situation, and settled down to enjoy the second half.  Unfortunately, within a few seconds of the restart, the Italians started talking amongst themselves, and then the younger two of them started kissing and cuddling.  After a short while, the young male comforted the older woman on his right and kissed her hand and cheek – I assume it was his mother, as so many Italian males seem to think it is not right to go out for the evening unless their mother comes too.

Before I got a chance to lean forward and suggest that they might like to keep quiet and stop eating each other, the chap on their right indicated very forcefully that they should behave themselves and they got the message.  That’s not to say they behaved themselves after that, but it was not completely distracting. 

Why did they bother buying tickets?  It was clear that none of them had any interest in being there and the two women, in particular, were bored beyond measure.  Fortunately for the enjoyment of the rest of us in their vicinity, it was Beethoven’s 9^th Symphony being presented, so plenty of noise involved, and the quality of the performance was spellbinding.

Wish the old ladies had stayed in those seats though.